4 Ways Leaders Become Role Models and Gain Trust When Communicating about COVID-19

The Simple Truth

COVID-19 and Leadership

We are experiencing one of the most challenging times. The angst of the public and how we respond dramatically depends not only on what our leaders tell us; but also on their actions. While there have been other outbreaks and other health scares, Coronavirus or COVID- 19 seems to be more challenging, in part because of how government leaders have handled the simple truth.

While the scientific and medical experts are tackling the pandemic of the Coronavirus, they are also fighting the fake news "infodemic" that, in today's times, can spread faster than any wildfire. Media leaders are dealing with this heightened "demic" while also attempting to provide the best leadership and guidance for their employees. From the first plague, in the 17th century, rumors have always started. With the distribution of newspapers, information traveled slowly. The invention of the radio moved the story a little faster, TV accelerated the pace, and social media propelled the speed of information and, unfortunately, misinformation, to an exponential level. Today, countries are spreading stories to blame other countries; politics has distorted the day. Billionaires are allegedly starting the virus, and nationals are trying to squash racism. We are hearing the fake news and wondering why it is coming from our leaders. The believability of any narrative shared depends on the creditability of the messenger.

Where does that leave us? Some of the words used to describe the information regarding the Coronavirus, being shared by our country's leaders, are: confusing, ridiculous, hilarious, overwhelming, outrageous, and frustrating. We don't know what or whom to believe.

Should I shake hands?

Should I wash my hands? 

Should I do an elbow bump?

Should I go to work?

Should I work from home?

Should I be around elders?

Should I be around children?

Should I fly?

Should I take a cruise?

How many are affected? How many have died? How long will this last? Why aren't we getting tested? The more we don't know the more questions that arise, the more primary leaders, whom we look to for straight talk and direction, give us mixed. The more complicated the situation becomes, the more conflicting the messages have become.

When we were young, we looked to our parents to give us leadership and direction. We expected our teachers to guide us. We seek our religious leaders to bring us together. We've grown accustomed to looking for an authority figure to make sense of the unknown and give us direction. We want someone who will comfort us when we were distressed. That same emotional need permeates throughout our life. Today, what we are looking for that comfort from our leaders, from the adults in the room - simple truth.

Many are angry: "Why aren't they telling me the truth about what's going on?" Many are anticipating: "I've had the test, or I know I need the test when can I have it?" Then there is disgust:" if they would just stop talking about it." Others are happy: they tested negative. Others are surprised: "Oh, not me; I feel fine." Others are anxious: "will I get the virus." Others are depressed: they're in quarantine. Yet others are sad: because they have lost loved ones. And above all, there is fear: the fear of the unknown is the most stressful of all. At any time, this roller-coaster of emotions may touch us all.

To allay many of the emotions, great leaders act as role models and gain trust in these four ways: displaying a calm demeanor, providing correct information, delivering coherent messaging, and providing clear direction. They make the complicated simple. What an ideal time for leaders throughout the world to unite in support of providing leadership that will help to build the trust and psychological safety needed during a time of uncertainty and chaos? The challenge presented by the COVID- 19 is not over. For reassurance, we must have faith and trust our leaders are giving their best efforts to find the solutions very complex circumstances while sharing with the masses, the simple truth.

EQ + IQ = Toni Morrison

August 9, 2019

The emotional quotient is the measure of naming, decision making, and responding based on emotions. The intelligence quotation is a measure of mental performance and chronological age. Toni Morison was a great example of the balance of emotional intelligence with high intellect can lead to successful outcomes. She achieved exponential success for herself and empowered many others.

The world is saddened at the loss of Toni Morrison in the body; however, we rejoice that her spirit is present forever in her writings. Rest in Peace, Ms. Morrison. To get to know her, check out the excellent documentary, Toni Morrison: The Peices I Am.

Below are some of her words of wisdom left for us.

16 Toni Morrison Quotes to Make You Hold Your Head High

By Flavia Medrut - December 4, 2017

“You are your best thing.”

“You wanna fly, you got to give up the thing that weighs you down.”.

“Make a difference about something other than yourselves.”

“Somebody has to take responsibility for being a leader.”

“There is really nothing more to say-except why. But since why is difficult to handle, one must take refuge in how.”

“As you enter positions of trust and power, dream a little before you think.”

“I get angry about things, then go on and work.”

“You need a whole community to raise a child. I have raised two children, alone.”

“I would solve a lot of literary problems just thinking about a character in the subway, where you can’t do anything anyway.’”

“If there’s a book that you want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it..”

“Love is or it ain’t. Thin love ain’t love at all.”

“At some point in life the world’s beauty becomes enough. You don’t need to photograph, paint, or even remember it. It is enough.”

“She is a friend of my mind. She gathered me, man. The pieces I am, she gathered them and gave them back to me in all the right order.”

“Sweet, crazy conversations full of half sentences, daydreams and misunderstandings more thrilling than understanding could ever be.”

“And I am all the things I have ever loved: scuppernong wine, cool baptisms in silent water, dream books and number playing.”

“Anger … it’s a paralyzing emotion … you can’t get anything done. People sort of think it’s an interesting, passionate, and igniting feeling – I don’t think it’s any of that – it’s helpless … it’s absence of control – I have no use for it whatsoever.”

Three Concepts to Manage Your Emotions, Money, and You

1. Depending on outside sources for your safety net or retirement is a strategy destined to fail. Company matched employee funds will potentially run out of money in two to three decades. Nearly half of companies that offer 401(k) plans don’t provide employer matches, per Fast Company.

2. There is no speed saving. Be in it for the long haul. You may not feel that you have a whole lot of capacity to save; however, planning, investing and saving is vital.

3. Your most significant investment is YOU! Invest in your health, keep learning, and give back/pay it forward. Exercising (improves self-image and emotional well-being), meditating (reduces anxiety and stress), and volunteering for a cause important to you (minimizes the risk of depression and gives you a sense of purpose) can all contribute to higher emotional discernment and a happier, healthier relationship between money and you.

Call to Action

• Write down three goals you will make to improve your financial situation during the next twelve months.

• Outline the steps you will take reach your goals.

• Post your plan where you can see it as a daily reminder.

Today is your best day to invest in your emotional, financial health.

TRUST

Someone wise once said: "Trust is everything." And, when it comes to individual and organizational performance, they were on to something very important. 

Trust is the foundation of all relationships, including those relationships that we establish and sustain at work.  Building and sustaining trust may be even more important in a work setting because, unlike with family and close friends, we have limited interactions and a narrower range of situations with which to test and display our trust for one another. 

When trust is present, we interact with an assumption of mutual respect and support. On a day-to-day basis, the mutual trust may be untested but the assumption is still there. So, when a work situation arises involving them -- and they will arise -- one person expects the best behavior and interaction possible from the other person. Both colleagues seek an opportunity to talk and reach resolution of the situation.  Yes, the communication may be awkward or even testy, but both trusting persons are expecting a mutually agreeable conclusion. The final outcome might be that the two people decide to "agree to disagree" but, ideally, the trust and respect between them remains intact. If so, when another situation arises, that trust is there to draw upon again. Now imagine a situation that ends differently, where the parties involved do not communicate well and tensions between continue. In this outcome, trust is damaged and, unless addressed, it may continue to erode over time.  

Without trust, relationships are shallow and superficial. When a work situation arises involving two people without trust to rely upon, you can assume that Murphy's Law -- that is, anything that can go wrong, will go wrong -- will rule the day.  If one person is expecting support from the other, that is not likely to happen. If one person is expecting the best behavior or reaction from the other person, they can't count on it. If both people are hoping to resolve the situation amicably, that's unlikely. Without trust, there is no "benefit of the doubt," no grace or forgiveness to give. 

Trust is both dependent and reciprocal: I trust you so you trust me, and vice versa. When either person disappoints the other person in regards to trust, it not only impacts the disappointed person but also the relationship between them. As trust wanes, people assume the worse of others, and as a result, they get the worse from them. In a relationship where trust has been lost, everything else comes under scrutiny: Can I count on this person's reliability? Honesty? Competence? What else might be risky about this person?  

Relationships at work cross gender, age, cultural and ethnic attitudes and behaviors and these factors will also impact the issue of trust in relationships. Sometimes people display their feelings and communicate differently based on personal histories. For people to build trust in their relationships with others, they must be aware and sensitive to how diversity factors influence how people interact with one another. 

These concepts of trust also apply all organizations. Trust should be the cornerstone of any organization: not just working relationships between colleagues but relationships between departments, functions and roles, and all levels of management and non-management may evolve in positive or negative ways based on trust. 

The bottom line is this: Given the realities and demands of the workplace, relationships functioning without trust are not sustainable. And, over time, a pervasive lack of trust leads to a working environment where fear, insecurity, anxiety, paranoia, overcompensation, complacency, sabotage thrives. Work relationships become unstable and, as a result, performance declines leading to lost revenue and customer loyalty.

Understanding the essential role trust plays in our professional relationships isn't hard to grasp or embrace. However, with the complexities of humans, groups, and organizations, realizing and sustaining trust in the workplace can present challenges.

At Entevos, we guide your organization -- and individuals within your organization -- explore the trust phenomenon and learn successful strategies for enhancing trust in working relationships.

The Courage to Speak Your Truth: A Case for Understanding Emotional Intelligence (EQ) in an Era of Fear

“With integrity, you have nothing to fear since you have nothing to hide. With integrity, you will do the right thing so that you will have no guilt.” ~ Zig Ziglar

Once upon a time, there was a woman who told her story of being assaulted by a man. The man denied the allegation. They both wanted the opportunity to share their truth and be heard. They went on a TV show to tell their story to the world…CUT!

We were not dreaming or watching a TV reality show. We were watching the reality of the Senate hearing for the next Supreme Court Justice of the United States. The testimonies of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford and federal court Judge Brett M. Kavanaugh riveted the country. Some said, “I could not take my eyes off the TV,” others said, “I could only peep a few moments at a time,” while others said, “I simply could not watch the hearings.” Regardless, over 20.4 million viewers tuned in. While not written by screenwriters, the hearing had all the drama, comedic moments, and mystery of award-winning stature. The effects of which will be discussed and analyzed for years to come.

As I watched, I experienced increasing validation of why understanding Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is needed more than ever. During the hearing, Dr. Ford shared her story and answered questions about her actions. Her behavior was calm, compelling, and evoked emotion. Judge Kavanaugh displayed his feelings about the process and responded to questions about his activities as minimally as possible. His response was of entitlement, disbelief, and arrogance at the idea of anyone questioning his right to this esteemed job. His belief is because, during his life, he had punched all the right tickets.

Both Dr. Ford and Judge Kavanaugh expressed their emotion of fear. Dr. Ford feared by sharing her truth; she would be discredited. Her truth is she is a victim of sexual assault, and in terror, she ran. She explained her reality with facts such as the memory of laughter remaining in the hippocampus. Judge Kavanaugh feared his truth would cost him prestige. He had never had to answer for his behavior in previous background checks. His reality is that he is a victim of grave injustice and in anger lashed out. She was afraid to tell her truth. He was fearful of his truth.

Regardless of what drove their fear, the resulting request of each was for the opportunity to share their truth. Both had suppressed their emotions over the years. The sudden public release of that emotion has resulted in outcomes that neither probably wanted or expected. Following the testimonies, some male Senators said demeanor, tone, and body language doesn’t matter. Please, ask any woman if that is the feedback they have been given. Stroking the flame of fear has become commonplace. Leaders have set the example and permitted individuals and groups to provoke fear in those they don’t understand, agree with, or like.

This unfolding saga of appointing a SCOTUS has highlighted the need to pay immediate attention to managing emotions. Today, fear is being encouraged and stoked across the country. Instead of finding constructive ways to express feelings, people are choosing behaviors that could potentially have long-lasting destructive effects.

As we observe the blatant disrespect shown to others, rudeness, narcissism, denial, and lack of accountability, it seems as if everything learned regarding societal norms is a myth. It appears bullies and bigots have been given a hall pass, with no expiration date, to respond with sarcasm and ridicule. A recent example was during a Presidential news conference. A female reporter was called on to ask a question and was told, “I know you-you are not thinking, you never do.”

In recent years our nation has entered an era of fear. It is no wonder that people are becoming emotionally confused. They feel things are out of control, and are they are powerless to effect change. Males fear false accusations of inappropriate behavior; Whites fear losing power; Blacks fear of losing their lives; Hispanics and Latinos fear immigration; Muslims fear being misunderstood; Millennials fear failure; women fear for their sons; men fear for their daughters; men fear for their sons; women fear for their daughters; senior citizens fear losing independence; leaders fear of being insensitive; employees fear becoming unemployed; singles fear not finding a mate; couples fear separation or divorce; politicians fear to lose their seat; voters fear to lose their rights; and, the list goes on.

This era is different from the fear that resulted from international terrorism. We do not fear someone coming into our house; this fear is rooted in our home. How can we address fears, so the nation does not become paralyzed, and citizens can move forward collaboratively? Understanding EQ is one solution. In the 1990’s, the writings of Peter Salovey, Ph.D., and John Maye., Ph.D. defined emotional intelligence based on neuroscience research. EQ became popular with the public in 1995, in his book, Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman, added personality attributes to the empirical data. Goleman examined how having high EQ may be more important than high IQ.

Emotions are ever-present. They provide us with data to make decisions and are regulators of our actions. We are ALL emotional beings. When someone labels you as emotional, don’t take it personally, recognize that you are not alone - you are in the company of every person in the world! Whether the behavior is judged good or bad depends on your response to a situation. Joshua Freedman, author of “The Heart of Leadership,” says “EQ is the difference that makes the difference. People with strong emotional intelligence skills rise above any situation. They don’t let other people push their buttons, and they connect with others more effectively.” Learning to manage a wide range of emotions can help minimize the feelings of confusion and apprehension brought on by fear.

We should not lose sight of the main story; a woman dared to share her truth. Dr. Ford used EQ to describe and share her truth. Judge Kavanaugh used EQ to explain and share his truth, and he used courage to tell his truth. For me, the takeaway is through fear; both witnesses found the courage to share their truth, and both desperately felt the need to be heard and understood. Regardless of race, sex, religious beliefs, cultural experiences, or political ideology, the feeling of being listened to is something the majority of us desire.

This article is not about judging the truth. It is about the importance of using EQ to help us courageously share our reality in ways that can result in the best possible outcome for ourselves and others. EQ helps us understand the messages we receive from all our emotions, recognize our patterns of behavior, and make choices for more effective outcomes. EQ can be learned. The lessons have been taught in personal growth, leadership development, and employee and student engagement, as well as facilitating the discussion of diversity and inclusion. It will assist with the ability to share our truths constructively. What it will also give us is a license over the one thing that we can truly control – ourselves. This point in our history seems like the perfect time to begin these lessons.